Things that I love

A fellow cancer survivor said it's important to list at least 5 things that makes you happy on a daily basis and do 10 if you're feeling down. Life gets crazy at times and we sometimes forget to focus on what makes us beam inside and out. By nature I'm a pretty serious person but I'll list the first few things that pop into my mind. Maybe you should too!

1. Smell of rain.

2. Sammy being super playful and super snugly

3. Nice belly laughter with friends

4. A good cup of coffee (I know, I should be cutting back.)

5. A good page turning book

6. Long walks in the fall

7. Happy babies

8. Children's innocence

9. The satisfaction of succeeding in something you worked so hard for

10. Lazy days

11. Hours on the phone with friends

12. Good sound sleep

13. Clothes that fit well and that are comfortable, love my flip flops!

14. Delicious food

I think I might be a variant

I finally spoke with my oncologist and she explained that my Tamoxifen metabolizer test came back fairly inconclusive. Hmmm...didn't that happen with my genetic BRCA testing? I have these variants that may make me metabolize them at an intermediate level. Basically, I am getting some benefits of a drug that I have to take for five years but I'm not getting all the benefits.

I have a handful of side effects from Tamoxifen. We discussed that I can get Lupron shots that will suppress my ovaries. I may stay with the Tamoxifen since I at least know what the side effects are. She did say that I can switch off and on between the two for the remaining three years. Lupron will probably start my hot flashes again. With Austin weather, I should probably hang tight until the winter at least! :)

My insurance made me cry today

I wonder how many total minutes I have clocked on the telephone with my insurance company since I've been diagnosed. I am estimating that I spent close to 30 minutes with them today. 30 minutes on something that I've been trying to address with them since January and we're in mid-April.

I need to rent Sicko. Paul, if you're reading this, it's still on my to do list! I'm sure it will just anger me more than I already am.

Anyway, it took me breaking down out of frustration for the person I spoke with to show any compassion or try to truly "help" me. I sort of have the information I need. Again, I will call my doctors on Monday and spend more of my own time trying to figure out what is covered because nobody seems to be able to give me a straight answer.

On a positive note, I went up to my old school for a few minutes and it was wonderful seeing the old Pease gang. I will always feel at home with my fellow staff members there. I also miss the kiddos. I had a little fourth grader come up to me. She gave me a huge hug and then asked me if I would please come back and teach. Her big blue eyes were looking at me with such intense and plea, talk about touching your heart! It made me want to drop what I was doing that day at to get back in the classroom! My would be sixth graders this year have gotten so big! I still need to look into being a mentor or tutoring more often.

Chemo Curl

The coined term of "Chemo Curl" is the curl we get when our hair grows back. Chemotherapy can stay within our system for up to a year. As my hair started growing out, it became wavy. Most people I know comes back very curly. I guess my long, straight Asian hair made it come back just wavy.

I hated my curls but tried not to complain about it since I felt grateful that I had hair. I moussed it down as much as I could until a hair stylist suggested that I flat ironed. I flat ironed from October to February and it helped me go through an awkward stage as my hair was growing out.

The picture on top was when I flat ironed and it was taken in New Mexico with my family in December of 2007. The picture on the bottom was the chemo wave that was taken March 2008. I no longer flat iron. It is long enough to pull up at the sides or as an entire pony tail! I've learned to embrace my wave and everyone seems to love it. I love the fact that it doesn't take long for me to get ready in the mornings.