Dreams

We dream all the time but most of us will not remember our dreams unless we write them down upon waking.  My sleep is much improved now that I'm a year out of Tamoxifen but the quality still fluctuates with time due to hormonal fluctuation.  I've had some vivid dreams recently.  They are so vivid that I did not write them down but I remember them.

After I got back from MDA I had a dream that I was pregnant!  Last night I had a dream that my P53 test came back positive!  I don't know if it's the deeper sleep that I'm getting or if I haven't had time to really think about the impact of the P53 test but both were freaky!  I remember at one point in the night wiping away tears.

It's been a week since I had my blood drawn for the test.  I'm hoping the results will come in by the end of this week or early next week.  I decided to wait for the results before making my appointment with the gyno even though I need to see her for my yearly anyway.  I'm waiting and all the while hoping I haven't opened Pandora's box.  Maybe Dr. Litton was correct that genetic counseling was a good idea.  It's about bedtime and I hope I dream of something nice...maybe something that doesn't even have to do with cancer.  Maybe I can dream of fat chubby puppies or my sweet niece and nephews!