Happy Mother's Day and My Last Visit with Dr. H

Happy belated Mother's Day!  The above picture was taken two years ago celebrating my youngest nephew's belated 4th birthday.  

As promised, I need to write up an update regarding my last office visit with Dr. H.  It pertains to Mother's Day so I saw it fitting to write about it today.

I saw her end of March since I've graduated to every six months follow-up.  I got off of Tamoxifen end of July and have been without treatment since.  Sleep and sorts were rocky the first few months but it makes sense since I was on Tamoxifen for so long.

I'm 10 months post Tamoxifen and I initially asked Dr. H if I could take a year off of treatment.  The key word is initially.  I'm finally starting to feel "normal," whatever normal is post treatment and now 35.  :)  I opened up the visit with her asking about children.  I don't know if that is an option in my future since I'm 35 and I'm single.  I'm pretty confident after the last FORCE conference and talking to the big breast cancer gurus that I'm not BRCA+.  I don't know if I want children but I don't know if I don't want children either.  I always thought one would be nice and two at the most.  I thinking meeting the one would make it a no brainer.  I don't foresee myself being a single mom since I'm uncertain if I would be able to be a good mom doing it by myself.  Besides her fab shoes Dr. H is always known for her one liners.  She leaned into me when I told her about being uncertain about being a single mom and told me, "Aren't we all single moms?"  In case you didn't know, her husband is also an oncologist and was probably in the office next door to us.  They have two boys.  :)

Anyway, she agreed that I could be off of treatment until I decide not to have children or until I was done having children.   She wants to to see the good folks at MD Anderson to be cautious.  (There is a back story to them also but not so important to add right now.)  So I'm thinking 39/40 the latest as my cutoff.  If not, adoption is always a possibility.

As for routine screenings, we're going to forgo the MRI since I'm allergic to the gadolinium and we're going to forgo the CT to minimize the radiation.  I will have a bilateral chest ultrasound this year and we'll decide about next  year when it comes.

Checking in on My Goals for 2012

As a reminder, my goals back in January:  
1. Guitar class
2. Cruise of Western Caribbean
3. DC for a conference and to meet up with an old friend that I haven't seen since 1997. (Never been to DC either)
4. Swim in 6 feet pool
5. Get my braces off!
6. Complete my professional development hours to renewal my teaching certificate
7. Get accepted to Project Lead

As of May 11, 2012 I can successfully check off 3 of my 7 goals:
1.  Went on my cruise and saw the most amazingly clear and beautifully blue water
2.  Just got back from DC and am energized to do more.  Lobby Day was an interesting experience but it was being surrounded by fellow advocates, the Supreme Court and other historical markers that made me realize that one person can make a difference.
3.  My braces came off the end of March!

Chitchen Itza-One of the new 7 wonders of the world.  My sweet roomie is in the back in the pink hat. 

San Francisco Beach @Cozumel

Last day out at sea and I got to witness the beautiful sunset

Where I'm at with the rest:
1.  I start my 1st of 4 guitar lessons on Monday.  I'm uncertain how much I'll learn in 4 lessons since I'm so musically decline.  Yes, I'm not using the word correctly but it really is the opposite of incline. But I might surprise myself and sing and play Smelly Cat beautifully after my 4 classes!
2.  I've done some swimming this year but not in the 6 feet pool.  Part of the reason is that I realized that I'm allergic to chlorine or some cleaning agent.  I used to think it was because I was swimming in an outdoor pool but I've only been swimming in indoor pools and have had massive sneezing attacks and red itchy eyes afterwards.  My sure how successful I'll be with this goal.  Stay tune!
3.  I've started working on my professional development so I'm pretty confident I'll be able to renewal my teaching certificate by the time it expires later this year.
4.  I have my forms for Project Lead so I'm in the process of applying for it.  To be continued!

Don't think this Iron Chef needs an introduction.  He was hilarious!  For the first time in 16 years I ate pork and beef over the weekend.  Detox was need after that weekend.

Spent time with Mary Ann and Summer at Food and Wine Festival.  We dined at Uchiko too. (Notice how I'm braces free and sporting my Zooey bangs)

How lucky and I to then turn around and see Michelle, Justin, Brooke and Brock.  (Brock was running around)

I have more to add and more pictures to post but this will have to be enough for now.  April and May were a whirlwind of activities and special surprises.  I also need to recap my last visit with Dr. H.  So more to come in my next post.

Those of us that are left behind

I've been putting this off for a while now but I think it's time to write about it. Sammy ended his journey on Earth and continued on into Doggie Heaven on February 7, 2012. I always say that it's those of us on Earth that suffer the most when someone passes. Sammy is at peace but we are the ones that mourn for our lost. The above picture of him back in the summer of 2004. I decided that I wanted to include a picture of him when he was full of energy and healthy because the last few years were difficult to see him slow down and to see his health decline. We tend to only remember the difficult and sad things in life so I'm trying to remember the wonderful things.

Sammy was given the nick name of 99.9% for a reason. It was .1% human corruption or he would have been perfect. I'm getting very emotional as I write this so I'll end that he was like a child to me. He was my chemo dog. He was there for me when I was down in the trenches in life. He was my teddy bear. He was my pillow. He was my green drinking dog. He was my sweetheart. He was my smiles. He had a heart of gold. He will be dearly missed and will forever have a special place in my heart.

2012 Update

It's already March and I've been delinquent on my blog. I'm 37 days away from my cruise. My cabin mate is a 31 year old stage IV and active in the cancer world. I'm excited to get to know her. When I get back an old friend from ABQ is coming in for the Food and Wine Festival. Let the glutinous feasting continue!

Another big announcement, drum rolls please, 14 days until I get my braces off. Braces off before my cruise is going to be fabulous! I'm so excited! To celebrate their removal, I'm getting true bangs. My coworker suggested Zooey Dechanel bangs. If I get tired of them in my eyes I can can sweep them to the side.

I see Dr. H again in 12 days making it my first 6 month follow up...the longest since I've seen her. She's not going to like how I'm going to ask her for at least 2 years with no hormone inhibitor meds. I'm really thinking of asking her for 5 years making me meds free until 40. I've really been focused on diet on a way to control estrogen and I recently got back from a CAM conference that makes me really want to try it my way. I've done everything I was told to do conventionally so it's not as if I'm becoming an extremist. Of course I will be open minded and listen to her pour over the stats. I just would like to feel like a somewhat normal 35 year old again. More details after my visit with Dr. H.

2012

I decided I don't like the concept of New Year Resolutions because I believe balance of happiness, exercise, nutrition, and all the obvious are really just well...obvious! Instead these are my hopeful goals of 2012:

1. Guitar class
2. Cruise of Western Caribbean
3. DC for a conference and to meet up with an old friend that I haven't seen since 1997. (Never been to DC either)
4. Swim in 6 feet pool
5. Get my braces off!
6. Complete my professional development hours to renewal my teaching certificate
7. Get accepted to Project Lead

I'm sure I'll have more to add but I thought of these this morning while drinking my green drink.

Recap of a Whirlwind December 2011

Happy New Year! December really was a whirlwind. It had many ups and downs and so much so that they were two opposite extremes. I'll start with the downs and end with the ups since my old tennis coach always told me to end on a good note.

Downs:

• A 34 year old passed away in December from breast cancer and her entire diagnosis is rather complicated and somewhat confusing. Regardless of that, she left behind a family and an entire community of friends that will miss her dearly.
• A friend of mine had to put down her 10 year old dog that she loved dearly.
  
• Another friend found out her mom won't really benefit from standard medications so will try complimentary alternative medicine for her cancer/pain.
• Another gal spent Christmas in the hospital because she had brain surgery and her wound was not clotting.

Ups:

• I got to meet Andy Roddick! He's even cuter in person and is such a nice guy! He let us take a picture of him and he could have easily said no to it. I tweeted him the picture and thanked him again saying I'm a hug fan. The picture is us at the Tacky Sweater Party. I was there with Kelly and Kathy.
• I went back to my old stomping ground Pease Elementary a few weeks ago to bring them some holiday snacks and lunch for my former work husband, Nick. I love those guys and was able to chat with most of them during their lunch break. The biggest highlight of that visit was that my former sixth grade student, Daniel, is now 20. He's a part time childcare teacher while going to school to become...a SIXTH grade teacher! He saw me in the lounge and told me he had something for me. He handed me a Bobcat Bulletin which is their school newspaper. I did the Bobcat Brief with them! Craziness is that we both have the same car but his is silver and mine is gray. For the longest time he always wanted my car, Honda Accord, and to drive a stick. I went home that day to check my teaching certification because seeing how much I impacted Daniel made me continue to realize that one person can and do make a difference.
• Quality time with my nephews! I had such a great time with them this summer and this December. We have many funny memories to share that would take too long to explain. One quick share is that I had the radio on and LMFAO song "Sexy and I know It" was on. Ben asked me what sexy meant. I told him to ask his parents. His father told him that it was his Aunt and Grandma. Very sweet. Ben kept singing "Sexy and I know it" in the restaurant.
• Quality time with old friends in NM. I pretty much got to see all my good friends from high school and college. There were a few exceptions but I still love them all none the less. I was able to see the group above for tea at the Dunlap's new house. Photo credit to Justin. I was able to catch up with Paul at Flying Star. Ironically I ran into someone from Austin at Flying Star! It really is a small world. I also got to see Mary Ann, Alicia and Sue again on my last night at Flying Star. It made me realize that the reason I love Flying Star so much is that I love the countless hours of bonding with my friends there throughout the years.
• Sammy made it to another Christmas! The poor guy wasn't doing well back in September. It got to a point where he couldn't get up by himself. He has both arthritis and neurological problems. Thankfully meds have helped with his quality of life. We're taking it day by day but the vet does not think he is in pain and he's able to get up by himself again. It might be his last Christmas but we're spoiling him rotten. As it should be because he deserves it.

I was able to end 2011 with my friend Michelle. She had a NYE get together at her house. It was fun catching up with her, playing trivial pursuits, watching fireworks and then ringing in the 2012. No resolutions for me this year. I'm looking forward to some traveling, balance in my life and spending more quality time with friends and family. So Happy New Year and hoping for happiness and good health to anyone reading this!

My New Hair Cut

Here you go! This is my before picture:

This is my after picture. Remember that I'm growing out the back to donate to Wig for Kids. It requires 12 inches so most likely I'll grow it out for two more years since I don't want my hair to be super short after it is cut. 12 inches is long so hopefully I'll continue to be patient.